im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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