I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
