She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
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