i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
We named our party play list daddy issues
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
