the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
