As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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