just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
There's always time for handjobs
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
As shirtless as possible
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
