I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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