i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
