The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
