smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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