he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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