...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
