She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
We were destined to go to rehab together
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
