...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
