I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
