fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
