What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm at about main and main street
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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