how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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