i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
