why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
