so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
