Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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