the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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