i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
