Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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