this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
