quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
