ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
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