Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
