I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
