This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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