you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
