Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
