I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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