sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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