Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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