I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
