You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
