Moan for me like Helen Keller
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
