just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Randomize
