i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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