This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
