This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
