To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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