And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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