sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
