6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
