we have officially mastered the walk of shame
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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