Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
